Chapter 5.21 – This feels familiar

-Emmalee-

It was good to see Kevin. It must have been at least five years since we last spoke.

He offered an ice cream shake and I couldn’t say no to that. We sat on one of the picnic tables and chatted.

“Are you here alone?” He wondered.

I nodded. “I’ve been staying in the cabin the last few months.”

“Really?” He raised his eyebrows. “What happened to the guy that stole you from me..” he said jokingly. “Caleb, was it?”

I looked down at the cup of ice cream topped with whipped cream and berries in front of me. “He..” I choked. I realized I never said the words to anyone other than my therapist. “He died.”

Kevin went quiet for a moment and then spoke very softly. “Em, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know. I’m an idiot.”

“It’s ok.” I gave him half a smile. “You couldn’t have known.”

There was an awkward silence after this. I could tell he was embarrassed even though it wasn’t his fault.

“So anyway.” I broke the the silence and tried to brighten the mood. “What’s new with you?”

Kevin opened his mouth, ready to answer but we were interrupted.

“Daddy, daddy.” A little girl, probably around four years old, was running towards us.

“Oh,” was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

The little girl jumped into Kevin’s lap. “Nana said it’s time to go home.”

“Ok.” He said to her and turned back to me. “I guess this is new.”

“Yeah.” I chuckled. It was hard to picture Kevin, the boy I met when we were just teenagers, as a father and a husband. “That’s pretty big news if you ask me.”

“Listen,” He glanced back on the beach at a middle age woman, probably his mother or, as his daughter referred to her, Nana, that was making her way to us as well, “I have to go, Lilli needs to take a nap, but I’ll see you, ok?”

I nodded slowly, but before I was able to say anything, the three of them where on their way out. Little Lilly holding her grandma’s hand on one side, and her dad’s hand on the other, chatting away.

* * * later that night* * *

I took a shower to wash off the sand and lake water and headed to the bedroom. Rocket jumped up on my bed like every night and waited for me to get in.

“I guess you’re mine now, huh?” I said and petted his head. His brown eyes stared at me lovingly. “I take it as a yes.”

Before turning the lights off I took my phone and looked up Kevin’s account on Instagram. I was curious to see Lilli’s mum, but there wasn’t a single picture of them together.

Weird, I thought and was about to turn off the light on the night stand when I heard a strange sound.

Tap

I look around to see where the sound is coming from.

Tap

“What the..” I opened the glass double door leading out to the second floor deck and walked into the breezy, but still very warm night.

“Kev?” I said surprised as I was looking down at him.

“Hey.” He grinned. “Surprise.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see you again. Can I come up?”

The idea of him in my bedroom didn’t feel right. I was glad to see him, but I was worried where it might lead.

“Hold on, I’ll come down. Wait for me in the pergola.”

I joined him in a couple minutes on the same spot where we shared our first kiss all those years ago.

“This feels familiar.” I smiled and sat down on the empty hanging chair. The other one was already occupied by him.

“Sure does.” He nodded. “I’m glad you came talk to me. I felt bad for leaving you on the beach earlier.”

“Don’t worry about it. Lilly needed you.” I said. “She’s cute by the way.”

“Oh I know, trust me. Objectively, the cutest.” He laughed.

“So how is it being a dad?” And a husband, I finished the sentence in my head. I wasn’t going to ask about Lilli’s mum unless he brought it up.

“It’s great…hard, too.” He answered honestly. “My ex isn’t exactly making it easier, so..”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok, I’m over her. It’s Lilly I feel bad for. I always wanted a complete family. My dad left when I was a seven, so I never wanted that for my kids, but here we are.”

We talked for a long time. I told him about Caleb and he told me about his past relationship. Him and his ex have a shared custody over their daughter, but they are not on good terms. Apparently she cheated on him.

I felt so bad that it happened to him. Again. The first time it was me who broke his heart, which I apologized for again.

“That’s ages ago.” He played it off. “I have an idea.”

He stood up and stretched his arm out to help me get up from the unstable chair.

“You’re scaring me.”

“Let’s go for a swim.” He suggested enthusiastically. “The water always feels the warmest at night.”

“I already showered.” I protested as he was dragging me closer to the shore.

“Who cares?” He pulled his shirt over his head, threw it on the ground and his shorts and underwear followed.

I watched him run through the water. He wasn’t shy and from what I saw, he had no reason to be.

“Come on, Em! It feels amazing.” He kept convincing me.

I had to admit it sounded rather tempting.

“Ok, turn around.” I ordered. “Don’t look!”

I undressed myself and stepped in the water slowly. He wasn’t lying, the temperature was perfect. I walked deeper and deeper, getting closer to Kevin until I was right behind him. “You can turn around, I’m in.”

He turned, creating small waves that brushed my shoulders.

“Beautiful night.” I said after a small moment of silence. “I’m glad you came tonight.”

Kevin nodded quietly, moving his body a little closer to mine.

I don’t know if it was the atmosphere or the fact that we were both completely naked under the surface of the water but dynamic between us dramatically changed. From an ‘old friend’ conversation to expectant first time lovers. The chemistry was undeniable.

Somehow his hands found my hips and I could feel the gentle pull.

Our bodies were pressed against each other, both of us breathing shakily. Other than that and the sound of tiny waves hitting our bodies, it was a complete silence. The only light was coming from the moon above us. I automatically wrapped my legs around him and our lips connected.

I let my lips get lost in his for a little while…

…but had to gently push him away. It felt like a commitment I wasn’t ready to make.

“I’m sorry. I can’t.” I blurted and started to walk away, pushing my body through the water.

“Em…” He called after me, confused. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to….”

I couldn’t hear what he didn’t mean, I finally made it back to the shore, leaving him behind.

A/N: Sorry about the dark pictures in the lake, this was the best I could do 😦